here are 6 magic phrases that make children listen to their parents
6 “Magic Phrases” That Help Children Listen
Kids listen best when they feel connected and emotionally safe. These six phrases calm the nervous system,
reduce power struggles, and make cooperation the natural next step.
acknowledging feelings, and keeping clear boundaries.
Let’s figure this out together ·
You can feel this ·
I’m listening ·
I’m on your side ·
I’ve got you
when children feel respected and heard, their defenses drop—and your guidance lands. Use the phrases below to
create that sense of safety in everyday moments.
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1) “I believe you.”
Doubt triggers shame and self-protection. Belief restores connection so your words can be heard.
Child: “I didn’t spill the juice on purpose!”
Parent: “I believe you. Let’s clean it up together.”
✔ Address the behavior without turning it into a debate.
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2) “Let’s figure this out together.”
Orders invite standoffs. Collaboration invites ownership—and kids stick to solutions they help create.
Situation: Child refuses to tidy toys.
Parent: “I see you don’t want to clean everything now. Let’s figure this out together. What’s the first step?”
✔ Holds the boundary while avoiding a power struggle.
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3) “You can feel this. I’m right here.”
In overwhelm, logic won’t land. Co-regulation—naming feelings and staying present—helps their nervous system reset.
Situation: Preschooler’s block tower falls; big tears follow.
Parent: “You can feel this. I’m right here.”
✔ Let the emotional wave pass before re-engaging.
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4) “I’m listening. Tell me what’s going on.”
Kids listen after they feel heard. Attention first, direction second, dissolves resistance.
Child: “I’m never playing with my brother again!”
Parent: “I’m listening. Tell me what’s going on.”
✔ Surfaces the real hurt so you can repair the relationship and the behavior.
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5) “I hear you. I’m on your side.”
Many meltdowns escalate when kids feel opposed by the person they need most. This shifts you from adversary to ally.
Child: “This homework is stupid! I’m not doing it.”
Parent: “I hear you. I’m on your side. Let’s find a way to make this easier.”
✔ Support turns resistance into problem-solving.
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6) “I’ve got you, no matter what.”
Mistakes can trigger shame. Unconditional care teaches that love doesn’t depend on perfection—while still allowing accountability.
Situation: Your child breaks a classmate’s project and calls you in tears.
Parent: “I’ve got you, no matter what. We’ll make it right together.”
✔ Builds trust and responsibility without fear-based compliance.
